2021 Roadtrip I, Chapter III

These posts are making me really happy! I don’t know why telling the story of how I interact with places matters so much but if I keep going maybe I will find out…

This was almost the start of my day, roaming through the town. (The very start was two hours of misty motorways, the sun rising, a hot air balloon in a pale sky, swift wheels on the road.) I loved this town. It was so pretty, spacious with views to the sky, and on a quiet spring Sunday morning had a sandy clean feel perfect for leisurely strolling in circles.

I think to myself, I could live here. I like to imagine living in the places I visit but really could have seen myself here. Though not in the centre, as these days I find I need the space more than the people. On the outskirts, in the countryside, but passing through regularly for the bustle. Something in me thinks that my future imaginary life is better than the one I’m living now, an upgrade, a bonus that I have to qualify for in someway. I always see myself as better in the future. Moving towards greater things. Life right now is almost perfect, possibly the best it’s ever been - do I mean that? There are struggles; I am fighting for things I’ve never had the guts to fight for before, and I do think in that sense that life will be vastly improved once the current fight is won. It might be a different life entirely. And I’m not sure where I’m living now, whether I really see myself in my current circumstances. It’s beautiful, but has terrifying moments. I am longing for the peace the future holds.